By now you probably heard the story about the collegiate women's softball playoff game in Portland during which a player, Sara Tucholsky of Western Oregon University, hit a home run and blew out her knee while running to first base.
Because Tucholsky was unable to trot around the bases, and teammates are not allowed to physically assist their runners, the homer was about to be revoked. However, to everyone's amazement, two members of the opposing team (shortstop Liz Wallace and first baseman Mallory Holtman of Central Washington University) picked Tucholsky up and carried her around the bases--a move that directly cost Central Washington the game and knocked them out of the playoffs.
Sports fans across the nation praised the action as being sportsmanly. The sports media all gurgled with appreciation. ESPN said it was the "ultimate act of sportsmanship." Who could blame them? In an era of egotistical athletes, cheating head coaches and dog-torturing superstars, it's understandable for this extraordinary act of selflessness to be viewed as true sportsmanship.
Except for one small problem - there was nothing particularly sportsmanlike about it.
According to Reference.com, sportsmanship is defined as "a component of morality in sport composed of... fair play, persistence, and courage."
OK, so right off the bat we can see these attributes do not quite apply to our girls: "Fair play" isn't relevant because there was nothing unfair about the ruling to revoke her homer. All players must round the bases after hitting a homer, not just Tucholsky. Nor does "persistence" seem applicable since "persistence," in this case, probably means persistence to win, such as not giving up when behind, or playing through an injury. And "courage" does not compute because there was nothing particularly courageous about what they did. Their actions turned them into national heroes. They are the darlings of the day. It took no "courage."
Granted, their actions were kind and selfless. All I'm saying is that I'm not sure sure they can be defined as sportsmanly. Take a look at the very first sentence of the definition which I believe proves my point.
"In a basic sense," says Reference.com, "sportsmanship is conforming to the rules of sport."
Exactly!
A sporting event is a world within a world. When you're playing a game or a match, you exist within an alternate micro-universe which has a series of arbitrary rules and etiquettes created specifically for the purpose of determining what it takes to compete within it. Thus, when an athlete excels within the confines of the rules and etiquettes of a sport, he is a good sportsman. Everything else is horseshit.
I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, Some things are more important than sport, which is absolutely true. In fact, most things are more important than sport.
Things like family, friends, commitment and dedication are certainly more important. So is loyalty--like, say, loyalty to your teammates, the ones who stood by your side all season long, who toiled and sacrificed to get to this point in the playoffs only to have a couple of Florence Nightingale wannabes throw away their dreams for some klutzy Anny-fanny who plays for Western Oregon!
Holtman and Wallace made a commitment to their team when they joined. Wouldn't the sportsmanly thing to do be honor that commitment? Because you can bet your bingo bucks that some, if not most, of the girls of Central Washington weren't entirely down with the decision to concede the playoffs.
And what about the cancer kids? Every team has one of those, right? Those little kids stricken with some terrible condition and are relying on their favorite sports team for motivation to keep fighting? What kind of message did they receive? For all Holtman and Wallace knew, their cancer kid was sitting on her hospital bed, watching the game wearing her CWU jersey, baseball cap and face paint, hoping beyond hope for an inspirational victory--only to see them hand over the game on a platter.
Not exactly promoting the fighting spirit, are they?
In an interview after the game, shortstop Liz said, "We didn't know that [Tucholsky] was a senior or that this was her first home run. That makes the story more touching. We just wanted to help her."
Are you kidding me? You just wanted to help her? If I were the pitcher on that team, walking off the field in miserable defeat, and overheard my shortstop saying that to reporters, I would've clubbed that bitch with a couple of pounds of Louisville aluminum.
"Help her?! What about helping me?! You're my shortstop--you're supposed to have my back, not stab it!"
And the fact that Tucholsky was a senior and this was her last chance to hit a homer before graduating is irrelevant. What if everyone started behaving this way within the confines of the alternate micro-universe of sport? What if Major League pitchers intentionally lobbed meatballs to hitters who are in slumps? What if defenders intentionally permitted touchdowns to help struggling quarterbacks? What if, suddenly, Chutes and Ladders players decided to bypass the ladders, taking only chutes?
The whole concept of competition and sport would implode, leaving behind only Hacky Sack as a way for humanity to exercise its warrior muscles.
Could you live in a world where the only sport to play was Hacky Sack?!
Look, in these annoyingly PC times, when everyone is expected to be nice to each other, and talking smack is akin to treason, and public-school officials teach that there are no losers or winners--can't there be this one place where it's OK to win and to want to win? Can't we just have one alternate micro-universe in which the desire to crush your opponent is acceptable, where it's OK to despise someone just because she's wearing a different-colored jersey, and where it's permissible to call somebody a "belly-itcher" without the ACLU dropping the hammer of Thor upon your head?
Look, it's not like I don't care that the poor girl got hurt. If I were playing that day, I'd have dropped my glove and helped her in a heartbeat. I don't care what the situation is, if you are hurt and need assistance, I will help. I will carry you off the field. I will carry you to the emergency room. I will carry you to the goddamn moon if that's the only place where knee surgeons live. I will carry you anywhere you need to go except around those motherfucking bases.
Comments (4)
Ed Decker presents the two poles of the meaning of sportsmanship, adherence to the rules and acting kindly to your opponent; and comes out in favor of the former. It's not that simple.
My sport is doubles tennis, which I usually play in the context of round robins, which is a group of men somewhat randomly playing against each other. What brings us back week after week in spite of bruised knees and more damaged egos is what only competitive sports has to offer, transportation out of one's daily existence into a world delimited by lines on a court.
Competition is an essential ingredient, as it demands we focus on doing what it takes to win the point. If you think about your sick child, disintegrating marriage, financial mistakes or the collapse of the American enterprise, you will miss that serve, so you block it all from your mind.
While you want to win, there is also the realization that the game can only exist with the continued cooperation of everyone. Without the need for verbal disclosure, or even conversations, we get to know each other. We know that missing an easy shot for one man means reliving the castigation of his father, ridiculing him for being a loser. So, we give him his few seconds to show contrition.
None of us, and damn few of any who play sports, will make a dime on the endeavor. Yet, we would be lost without it. It is something that can turn a seventy year old man into a kid at play. Essential to this magic is that elusive, and indefinable quality, made up of rules, competition and compassion-- that we happen to call "sportsmanship."
Posted by Al Rodbell | June 3, 2008 11:39 AM
Posted on June 3, 2008 11:39
I was in New York for a few weeks, and didn't see this CityBeat when it came out. But, I was in a pub the other day, and for some reason, this old issue was sitting there. I read your column, and loved it. In fact, it's the best column I've read, by ANY COLUMNIST, in the last 6 months.
It is on the girl that hit the home run in a college game.
I thought I was the only one that felt that way, until I read what you wrote. And...not only did you totally nail it. You did it with such humor, as you always do when you tackle a subject (loved your recent "bigot" column).
I get shit from my friends when I take that stance with that woman, or when that football player quit the Cardinals football team, making a million a year, to go fight in a war, then he was shot and killed, and I didn't think he was a "hero." They thought I was insane. I thought he was insane, no heroic.
And, Hank Bauer, former Charger and Channel 8 newscaster...I got into a huge argument with him at a party and then on the phone for 30 minutes, because a retarded kid wanted to play high school football. It was his dream (I'm not sure how retarded kids "dream" of playing football, the way, say, a regular kid does, but whatever). So, on a game when the team was winning by a big margin, they let the kid play in a down. He ran the ball for a 15 yard gain. The other team kind of let him run for a bit.
Well, my contention is this. Why do that? High school athletics is about winning. Youth sports, before that, is about sportsmanship, letting EVERYONE play, and learning the game, and being nice. High school, well, when I made my high school team, some kids were cut from the team. They cried, outside the gym. They then got taunted by their asshole friends, for not making the team. Imagine what would happen if those same assholes say "hey...you didn't make the football team, but some retard did."
Or, what if some asshole on the other team said, "Oh, so...they can be beating us by 25 points, and bring in some retard to try and score on us. Not on my watch." And then the retarded kid gets tackled really hard, and hurt."
Or, what about this. What if the retarded kid then decideds his dream, was to be on stage. And so the drama department has to let him have a line in West Side Story. And, he comes out singing "When you're a jet...." Where does it end????
The point of all this is....it's not always PC to call it the way it needs to be called. Which, your column always does.
It's my favorite thing to read in all of San Diego.
Josh Board
San Diego Reader
Posted by Josh Board | June 20, 2008 12:17 PM
Posted on June 20, 2008 12:17
So I guess that means we should just throw away the 3rd, 4th and 5th facets of sportsmanship?
Respect and concern for social conventions (e.g., shaking hands, recognizing the good performance of an opponent);
Respect and concern for the opponent (e.g., lending one�s equipment to the opponent, agreeing to play even if the opponent is late, not taking advantage of injured opponents);
Avoiding poor attitudes toward participation (e.g., not adopting a win-at-all-costs approach, not showing temper after a mistake, and not competing solely for individual prizes).
Posted by joshboardsucks | September 29, 2008 10:28 PM
Posted on September 29, 2008 22:28
I'm totally down with sportsmanship, Josh. Shaking hands, recognizing good performance - these are things I do routinely in all my competitive endeavors. I rarely show temper, except for the occasional - "oh fuck, I suck" eructation, never blame my opponents when I lose, and do not believe in win at all costs.
However, it just seems to me that helping somebody beat you in a competition is, if anything, an insult to them. And that the competition means absolutely nothing if you're going to help each other win. The very essence of competition is adversarial and, if you help each other win, then it's not a competition at all.
Which is fine, in it's own right. But when I'm competing, and somebody offers me a do-over, or an extra mulligan, or whatever, I always decline. I guess, because for me, competition - in it's purest sense - is exciting and invigorating.
Edwin Decker
Posted by Anonymous | September 30, 2008 12:04 AM
Posted on September 30, 2008 00:04