This is not a column about Proposition 8. It’s about the towering stupidity of its proponents.

In the days after Judge Vaughn R. Walker ruled that Prop. 8 is unconstitutional, I futilely scoured the Internet, print, TV and radio to locate just one anti-gay-marriage argument that did not, at some point, display colossal ignorance of our laws and government.

I’m not just talking about those random, dumbass-on-the-street interviewees, but also government leaders, journalists and spokespersons of powerful, national organizations—such as Wendy Wright of Concerned Women for America (CWA), who said Judge Walker has “declared his opinion to be supreme and ‘We the People’ are no longer free to govern ourselves”; such as Mascara Palin telling Sean Inanity of Fox News that it was “frustrating to see the third branch of government undoing the will of the people”; such as the dumbass-on-the-street CNN interviewee who claimed that, by ignoring California voters, Walker had turned America into a “dictatorship.”

Frustrating? I’ll tell you what’s frustrating. It’s frickin’ frustrating that so many people—including a frickin’ former vice presidential candidate and potential 2012 Republican nominee—doesn’t understand the most elementary principles of our system. (more…)

I have to admit, I enjoy surfing all those kooky fan pages and groups on Facebook. Some are hokey, like the “Powerful Blood of Jesus Christ” group (which displays a picture of a dove whose wings have been dipped in Christ’s blood). Some are hokie, like the “Happy Muslim Husband and Wife” fan page . And some are just plain stupid, like “Can This Goat Get More Fans than Barack Obama?”

The types of groups and pages are wide-ranging, but one thing they all have in common is that they crack me the hell up, usually unintentionally. Take the hilarious, “Dear Lord, Kill Obama” page. The real title is much longer and more laughable, but, yes, there actually is a Facebook page that prays for God to kill President Obama, and it has 1,185,299 fans—my sister being one of them! Well, I shouldn’t be surprised. During the campaign, she totally bought into all that “Obama the America-hating, Muslim, socialist, grandmother-murdering, turban-wearing Kenyan” business. Ah, don’t sweat it, Sis. It’s not your fault Mom accidentally put you in the microwave when you were a baby. (more…)

Every time somebody gets fired for something they said or wrote, such as recently when blogger Paul Shirley was fired by ESPN for making retarded comments about Haiti, there’s usually an interminable supply of Constitutionally confounded news commentators yammering about the First Amendment—such as CNN’s Joy Behar, who said, “I don’t think he should be fired for [exercising] free speech. I’m strict about the First Amendment.” (more…)

Recently, I drifted into a cigar and beer and wine bar to treat myself to a stogie and a brew. This particular establishment is known for its extensive draft microbrew selection and a palatial walk-in humidor that would make most cigar aficionados drool.

As usual, I was looking for something under 20 bucks. Aside from the fact that $20 is all I care to invest in something I’m going to set on fire and reduce to a small pile of ash, the truth is, I really can’t tell the difference between a $20 and a $100 cigar. I just don’t have the palate for it, so I don’t spend more than $20, which, I guess, makes me a cigar aficio-nada. (more…)