www.edwindecker.com 

Sordid Tales of a Bartender in Heat

Sordid Tales of a Bartender in Heat first ran in SLAMM magazine on March 5, 1997. When I pitched the idea to the publisher and editor, they were understandably concerned about whether there would be enough content to keep the column going. After all, the bar scene is a specific subject.

I told them the concept of Sordid Tales was about more than just bars – It was about a bartender. An anti-shaman who  espouses his theories and worldview with wit, bravado and humility.

In this way the column is not limited to bars. It is about everything else too. The columns are listed in chronological order, with the most recent on top and the very first (and oh so clumsy) Sordid Tales on the bottom. It’s called “Glossary of Terms.”

For a link to the current Sordid Tales visit www.sdcitybeat.com

Turn Turn Turn

 Customer Service

 Ms. Robinson

 Dead Zone

 Incident in New Orleans

 Tip Stealers

 Hot Snooker Mama

 Walk of Shame

You Know, Rock and Roll

 Credit Card Hell

 Peter Pan

 The Screamer

 Obligatory Valentine's Column

 Karla Karaoke

 The Stark Raving

 Fire on the Mountain

 Shufflebeard

  Booze Floozies

 A Special Kind of Hell

Whatever Dude

Why I Became a Bartender

How I Became a Bartender

Where I became a Bartender

What is Drink

ABC Primer

Tijuana is a Crazy, Crazy Place

Send in theSharks

A Sorry Lot

Bartender Nightmare

The Happy Room

Ed Decker is an Enormous, Festering 
Boil on the Ass of All That is Right and Good

Warrior's Ball 
(Super Bowl XXXV)

San Diego Boozer Zoo

Obligatory 
Robert Downey Jr. Column

Christmas Catalog

The Ejection of Stagger Lee

Itob Mama

 Ignorant or Evil

Winning the Room

Postcards from Alaska

The Juices of Boyhood

Book of Love

Fiend from Hell

Dear Sordid Tales

The Worst That'll Happen

Bartending School

Neanderthal Man

Small Town

Last Call

Maintenance Man

Jump the Bar

Opinionated Bastard

Incident at Balboa and Convoy

Salem USA

The Booty Call

Waitress in the Sky

Blind Man Bumper Cars

Omega Man

The Tippocratic Oath

Day Bar

Tokyo, Nevada

Knock Knock

The Lesbionic Romp

Mr. Bojangles

Sordid Feedback

Bar God

More on Tipping

Closing Time

Out of the Closet

Naughty Words

Words 

Phases

The Night

Phone Sex
Cable Guy
In Love Again Of King Kong
The Paper World Travler
First Glance Have Internet Will Travel
To Serve or Not to Serve Marty
Holiday Drunk Tank
California Kid Drug Czar
The Calling Cruciate Ligament 
Chicks Rule An Even More Sordid Tale of DUI
Smoke 'em if you Got 'em Hamlet
Moon Glo Beer Run
Hooters Tip Cup
Oh, That Place is Haunted Oh, That Place is Haunted Part 2
Look at the Moon Nightmare in Clairmont
Loony Tunes Iron Man
Candy Apple Super Bowl
Puke for the Buke Hooked on Lesbionics
Final Frontier Tipping Tips
Roach Guy Big Lie
Bouncer Diana
Martini Malaise Babes in Toyland
Babes in Toyland 2 Fired
Somebody Put That Ear On Ice! White Guy
DUI Pink Elephants
Get Laid Stupid Night of the Screwdriver
Crowd Control Scum Spotters
Hand Shake  Politics Glossary of Terms